not a blank email
*If you received a blank email earlier today, we apologize. Our web server reset some important settings without notifying us, and it caused some malfunctions. *
Today marks the day…
…the French Philosopher-Theologian Abelard was condemned for heresy, which was what all the cool kids were doing in the 12th century. He was also castrated in his sleep by the uncle of his student and lover, as well you know.***
To mark this occasion, all those coming to Jam Cellar tonight will debate on the conflict of realism versus nominalism, and Andy Reid will make castration puns all night. Also, DJ Allen Kerrwill condemn everyone to heresy. A wonderful, beautiful heresy, where Chick Webb plays drums.
It also marks the last Jam Cellar before the Big Big Event, where the Russ Wilson Orchestra will take the stage alongside The Boilermaker Jazz Band. Incredible instructors, incredible out-of-town guests, incredible music. The last day to register is tomorrow.
Here's what's happening tonight:
Don't Try This At Home Starts Tonight!
Our four-week series on the art of throwing women starts tonight, with special guest instructors Kenneth and Helena from Sweden! Partners only! 8:30 p.m.
New Blood Night June 17
Bring a newbie and you and your newb get in free. Or come to Jam Cellar if you've never been before, and you'll get in free! Then join the next Beginning Lindy Hop series starting July 1
Speakeasy Night June 24
Usher in the next depression with our Speakeasy Night June 24. We'll have a Jack-and-Jill contest, a bar in the back, and the foreboding and intoxicating air of a callously-indulgent prosperity without consequences. But, more importantly, a bar in the back. Dress for the 1920s. Call everyone "Old Sport." Listen to announcements at Jam Cellar for the secret password.
*** Abelard was famous for his great debate tactics, and used them to win the heart of his fourteen-year-old student Heloise ("So, Heloise, you ever, like, think about God?"). She got pregnant and they secretly married. Unfortunately, a misunderstanding lead Heloise's uncle to castrate Abelard in his sleep. This, ironically, ended his chances of promotion in the Medieval church. Heloise became a nun, which all the girlfriends of bad-boys were doing in those days. Abelard became a monk, but continued to teach and was many years later tried in Rome for treason for preaching philosophies that questioned unswerving faith. However, Abelard, always the incredible debater, died before the trial. He is supposedly buried next to Heloise in Paris.